I know, I know...I am a terrible blogger!! A lot of time has passed since my last post (new years eve) and I am on day 6 since my last chemo session last Monday. A new drug, Taxol-- that everyone had been telling me that I should find it more manageable than the previous sessions.
First catch up-- I had a difficult time after the New Years eve session so even though I had the 3 week grace period in between, it seemed to knock me harder. I suppose that so much of this is cumulative that you never fully get back to 100% but I did have a few good days before I was hit again this last Monday.
You might wonder what I am doing on the good days and I have to say, I look forward to them as it gives me an opportunity and excuse to do things that I never had time for before my diagnosis! I meet up with a lot of friends for lunches out, I go out to Galway city with my hubby to try different restaurants, we did dinner and a movie last sat night (saw les mis-- good movie, terrible singing, good acting-- hard to remake such a classic musical theatre piece) and have lots of lovely family cuddle time! I do a bit of work as well of course and I am pleased to say that our magnificent staff are working so hard flying the flag so that both Colman and I have very few work stresses! But it is nice to step briefly into those shoes from time to time and stretch my brain outside of cancer!
I miss my family at home. I really do. But I know that they are thinking of me and that makes me feel better! I think a lot of my mom and all that she went through and I have a whole new appreciation for just how strong, brave and courageous she was in her struggle. Mostly I think of how her faith brought her through all of it! While I must admit that it is difficult to pray or concentrate on prayer, I know that I am not walking alone on this journey-- I am comforted and consoled in times of struggle by God and my guardian angels. And I am so grateful for that!
We are now in the throws of decision making. I am heading to Dublin on Monday to try and rush a genetic test that should have been done in early November but wasn't. This test will tell me if I carry the breast cancer gene which increases my chances of getting it again. It takes up to 12 weeks to get the result (which leads me right up to my surgery) but will tell me whether I am having just a mastectomy or bilateral mastectomy. So kind of crappy that they have dropped the ball on this and the surgeons are still looking at me to tell them what I would like for them to do!!! Anyhoos, that's the health service in Ireland!
Now, back to 'how did heather fare on taxol?' Well, no nausea is good in my books. However, feeling like you are being drawn and quartered for 48 hours doesn't really 'sing' for me! My limbs were shaking with pain but....but we did get it under control on Friday and it has been smoother sailing since!!! Hallelujah honey! If the rest of the treatments are that controlled I will be singing in no time!!!
So as I entered into my 'well' week-- I just want to say that I continue to deeply appreciate all of your thoughts, prayers, emails, texts, cards. Masses etc etc! You are helping me and I feel truly blessed to have such wonderful people in my life!! And it's a great life!!!!
A special shout out to the most amazing man-- Colman- you are my rock, my shelter, my love and my friend! Thank you for standing by me in sickness! You do me such honour with your love and I am eternally blessed to call you husband!
(Sorry everyone else 'gag me with a spoon' but...for those of you who have seen and know colman--you know it's true!!!)
I love you all so much!!! Keep the faith (as I do) and don't worry!!!
With all my heart,
PS Only 3 more left!!!!